Description

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Today is the first day I've had the desire to write. I've thought about it for months, even years, but this is the first time I feel the need. I want to write of the struggle she's going through with this horrific disease; the everyday living. I want to write how the caregiver loses herself along with the victim. Victim--first time I've used that word. But there is no other word that best describes it. Carol is a victim of time. I've lost any thought that she'll get better. I've come to the conclusion I'm living alone, even though she's with me in body. She doesn't talk to me in understandable conversation. We play charades to discover what she wants. I've stopped all walks and exercise. My agoraphobia is back or has it just been hiding? I don't want to go to the store because I'm alone, even though she's at my side. I hate life, eating fatty foods, hoping to have a heart attack and die. Then I won't have to face her dying in front of me, inch by inch.

About the Author

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Born on Long Island then moving to Florida, Rose Lamatt spent fourteen years as caregiver for her dear friend with Alzheimer's. This led her to volunteer as facilitator for Alzheimer support groups. She helped open the first adult day-care center in her town and then worked as activity director for an assisted living facility. To this day she visits nursing homes keeping up her drive to make things better for the Alzheimer's victim and their caregiver.